What a Glorious Way to Live

Fifty-two dreams left on my list of 101 Dreams Come True.

When I made my list of dreams,  I never thought that my dreams would happen more than once or change my life in such a drastic way.

I was in Napa Valley when I made my list and I wanted the chance to attend a private party at a winery. It was a simple passing thought of decadence, yet it turned out to be one of the first dreams to ever come true. Not only did I go to the Perez family vineyard for Fourth of July three weeks after making my list, but I returned last year and this year's celebration will find me back at the vineyard. I've become part of a family and no longer need an invitation.

But it turns out that this dream come true wasn't done. Last Saturday, my friend Maryland invited me to a private Renaissance party at Castello Di Amorosa in Napa.

As the sun set we arrived in a SUV limo. Dressed in period clothing, I wore a maiden's outfit with a wreath of flowers in my hair while Maryland wore a Paige's outfit.

We drank wine, watched jousting, played with swords, and sat in the king and queen's thrones all while taking in the beauty of the Napa Valley at sunset.

At night fall we headed to the banquet area and feasted on fresh vegetables, pork, chicken, and strawberries. Ginger cake, powdered cookies, and scones were paired with sweet wines while fire dancers entertained the crowd.

After dinner we walked through the castle, exploring the stone caves deep within the belly of the property. Here we found torture chambers and barrel rooms.

It was a night of laughter, which ended in new friendships and another one of my dreams coming true. James, the man I'm beheading, has offered to teach me photography. He's an incredible artist, and I'm ecstatic that he is willing to teach me his craft.

I'm realizing, that to pursue my dreams has opened my world in ways I never imagined. The way the dreams come is always a surprise, and so far each dream has exceeded what my mind could conjure. Here's to fifty-two more dreams coming true in mysterious magnificence. To live a life of dreams, to believe that they are possible, is the grandest way I can live.

How's your list going?

A Summer of Dreams

52 Dreams Left to Complete 101 Dreams Come True

I've been spending some quality time in a hammock along the American river. My friend brought it with him, when he came to visit from Chicago, and we set it up between two trees and spent a leisurely afternoon swinging while we stared at the sunlight coming through the leaves. Unfortunately, this is the only summery thing I've done.

For the most part, my June has been about work. Many opportunities are presenting themselves, doors are opening in unexpected ways, and I've been working long hours. Instead of going after my dreams,  I've been updating the website on the dreams that have already come true. I've been working on business models and marketing strategies in order to spread the idea that making a list of dreams and pursuing those dreams can change your life. I never expected to do any of these things. Heck, I didn't plan on creating a website, but as more people from around the globe find the site, I realize that there's a chance I might be able to inspire others.

I'm also skating my heart out. In order to pursue my dream of passing my senior moves in figure skating, I've been spending over ten hours per week on the ice to pass my next test - novice moves. It's a huge step up from the skater I am. Each time I step on the ice I'm afraid to do the moves, but each day they become easier. A minor fender bender in May slowed my progress when it caused my lower back to spasm, but with chiropractic I'm able to go after my dream. I don't know if I will pass the test, but I'm going to give it everything I have.

So June has been about work. Not that there hasn't been some decadence thrown in. I did go to Los Angeles for my birthday. And the weekend I spent with my friend from Chicago was filled with wine tastings, long lazy hammock naps, fancy dress-up dinners, and a few hours lounging in the park. Oh and I can't forget the decadent chocolate cake I had on Saturday night. But if I want this summer to be amazing I have to start making a plan to go after what I want: white water kayaking, bungee jumping, hang gliding, camping trips, salsa dancing, and a whole lot of outdoor fun.

I think I've built my life so big that I now need three of me to enjoy all of it.

What dreams do you want to come true this summer?
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What has Happened to Our Society?

Fifty-two dreams left on my list of 101 Dreams Come True


Last Friday night, I was visiting friends and they had the television on. There was a time in my life, when television was my main form of entertainment. My partner and I would Tivo our favorite shows and spend over three hours per night watching the silver box in the living room. During the day, I took many breaks from writing and turned on the t.v. in order to wind down my brain. I'm afraid to count the hours I spent in front of the television. I'm certain it would add up to months of my life wasted.


When I left the relationship I made a pact with myself not to watch television. If I was going to change my life, I needed to get away from watching other people living and go out and get active. I'm not saying that I don't enjoy the occasional show. I'm rather addicted to reruns of "Gilmore Girls" and I find "Modern Family" hilarious, but my life is much richer and fuller now that I've turned off the tube.


But back to my original point, I had no idea what people were watching these days. I hadn't heard of "Keeping Up With the Kardashians", "Holly", or "Dance Your Ass Off". I had never watched the "Bachelorette". I was shocked by how many people watch hours of over-privileged, spoiled, pathetic people with no real sense of morality fighting with one another and bitching about life. Why would someone waste their time watching this? I'm told the show is hilarious, and I'm not trying to judge, but how is this funny?


Then last night, in the desperate attempt to clear the vision of the Celtics losing badly to the Lakers, I changed the channel to a show where Jillian Michaels from "The Biggest Loser" goes into homes of people who are overweight and over-cluttered to help them change their lives. It's a great concept and something needed in our country, but I had to wonder what people from other countries must think about the fact that the U.S. needs so many shows to de-clutter and to lose weight. How have we become such a bloated, complacent, over-stuffed (in many ways not just food) culture? 


What has happened to our society? We have more in this country than any other place in the world. We have some of the best medical, every opportunity open to us, and as a friend from S. Africa put it, the poorest person in America is better off than a large population of the world. So why are so many people miserable? Why has it become okay to sit in a large house, dump junk food down your throat, and complain about life while ruining your health? Why don't people want more? Oh that's right, they get more by shopping and over-stuffing their garages and homes with things they don't need.

I hear too many complaints about the economy, our government, and the world today. Yet, I don't see Americans doing anything about it. If every person who sat and watched the Kardashian sisters scream at one another, got off the couch and went after their dreams of a better life, or yet helped change the state of our country, can you imagine what our world would be like? I can, and it's a much prettier picture than the one we have. Better yet, if all the hours that were spent on Facebook, "connecting" to other people, were spent with family or out doing something with actual people, could our world be a better place? I believe it could be.

People keep saying that it must be nice to be able to live a life in which I pursue my dreams. My response, turn off the television, Facebook, Twitter, and go out and live. And when I say turn off the internet stuff, I also mean that when you are out doing an activity stop updating your social network sites with what a great time you are having and actually spend time with the people around you. You might make deeper connections.

If Only I Could Twist My Brain Sooner

Fifty-two dreams left on my list of 101 Dreams Come True

I woke this morning thinking that I might be wrong in some of my thinking. The more I pondered, the more I began to wonder if as a society we have made serious mistakes in our thought process that leads to painful lives. You will have to bear with me, as these thoughts are coming from the recesses of my brain that have been smushed into submission by learned theories.

Yesterday, I received an email from a man with whom I'd shared a relationship for the last year. At times, he could be supportive of the website and my decision to pursue my dreams. At other times, he was angry, grumpy and distant when I spoke about actually pursuing anything that didn't include him. In the end he tried to change and was rather supportive when I went to Europe this last time, but while I traveled I realized how happy I was on my own. Upon returning, I didn't wish to be with him anymore. I'd spent eight months crying and no matter how much he said he changed I didn't wish to be hurt any longer or to fight to be who I am in a relationship. I didn't do this casually, I took time to think, but when I told him my choice his response was an email that went straight back to the fights that had made me cry for eight months.


When I received this man's email, I had to ask why I put up with hurting for so long. There was good in the relationship, and in some ways I was manipulated into falling into the beauty in a repeating pattern of good and then hurt. If I'm honest with myself, I stayed because in some ways I believed that by being this outgoing, independent woman, I was unlovable. There is still a certain idea of who a woman should be in a relationship and though I tried to fight the stigma I'm told on a regular basis that who I am is wrong.

Through the ups and downs of the last year I feared that I would end up alone; another reason I stayed. Yet, once I left, my happiness returned. I remembered who I was without the constant weight of the manipulation. In leaving, in feeling happy within myself, I woke up and wondered how I could've ever thought it was okay to be treated the way he treated me. Why couldn't my brain twist to this conclusions so much sooner?

I'm beginning to wonder how many other ideas keep me from living an even more incredible life. Maybe fighting to make something right isn't the way it's supposed to be. We are an intense society with our roots in hard work, determination, and struggle. I don't believe in complacency. I know I won't reach my goals without going after them, but maybe life is supposed to be about flowing instead of battling. And when something doesn't feel right, when it's an extreme struggle, maybe that's a sign that it's the wrong road.

Two Year Anniversary of 101 Dreams Come True List

Tomorrow is the two year anniversary of when I made my list of dreams. When I think of all that has changed in my life it amazes me that only two years have passed - thirty dreams have come to completion and my life is forever changed.

I've been thinking about the emotional state I was in when I made my list of dreams. I'd just celebrated my birthday with the present of tremendous heartache. I felt like my insides overflowed with pain and that my life had little purpose. I had no idea where I was going and I felt alone.

This past Friday I celebrated my birthday in a much different way. It started on Wednesday night, when my California parents threw me a dinner party that included lawn bowling, charades, and a whole lot of laughter and love. Friday was another party where I learned how to pole dance. (Ladies you have to try this. It's like being on the playground again, but in a sexier way.) Then my friends took me dancing. The next day, I went to Los Angeles for more celebration. I've been flooded with presents, lunches, friendship, well-wishes, flowers, and most importantly love and a sense of belonging.

Going after my dreams continues to open my life in ways I couldn't have imagined. I've been asked by someone who saw the site if I would consider speaking in El Salvador about going after dreams and focusing your mind to create the life you want. This man wants to create a foundation where we would use the website to sell fair trade products to create jobs in third world countries while inspiring people to go after their dreams of a better life. A similar opportunity is opening in Romania. I don't know if either will work, but I can dream that this journey of mine can not only change my life, but help others to change theirs as well.

In all that has come to me, I've realized that I need to stop putting a time limit on when I complete my list. I originally placed the time limit because I didn't want to lose my focus. Now that going after my dreams has become a deeper part of my being, I no longer want to rush the experience. I want this journey to take me where it will lead without preconceived notions or stress.

I've always viewed my birthday as my New Year. When I think about what I want for this coming year, I realize I want to live as decadently as I can - to taste life without fear, worry, or self-doubt. I want it all and in the process of living to the fullest I hope that I can also help others to do the same.

It's a decadent life if you want it to be - go live it that way.