930 Days to Complete My List of Dreams
Before I made this list of dreams I spent most of my time trying to please others. I felt joy and love when my friends and family were happy. When I began to live for myself things changed for many people. I wasn't as available to fulfill their lives. I was still willing to be there for a friend whenever they needed me, but my focus turned more internal. As I achieved my dreams and began to live a life that over-flowed, there were people who judged me: I've been told that I'm selfish for the way I live my life; that I'm too outgoing; my long-time friend told me that she no longer respected my life. My relationship failed because he wanted me to be someone who stayed close to home. By going after my dreams I have lost many people and it stings my heart.
What's strange is that I tried to bring these friends along for the ride. I asked them to salsa dance or go skating. I shared my dreams and asked them to join me on my travels. Some friends cheered me on and asked to join. Others saw only what they would lose or their jealousy. If they would listen they would know that this journey isn't easy. I get scared, and for once I need the support from my loved ones.
In the end I can only be me. The person I want to be right now is the one that's willing to settle for nothing less than magnificence in her life. I'm proud of myself and this journey and I won't change for anyone. If someone really loves a person, shouldn't they want them to have everything they desire?
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
This entry spoke to me, straight to the heart of me. I am now dealing with making choices between my relationships and my dreams. thank you so much for the inspiration.
ReplyDeleteI've gone through this too. Lost a couple of friends. But sometimes they come back and the friendship is stronger than before because we're both living for ourselves now, not hiding behind each other.
ReplyDelete